So I started this a few days ago. Another speed paint. I've just been feeling a mix of emotions for the past weeks and this was something that I started drawing. What if?? What if everything could be perfect....could go back to the way it use to....What if emotions weren't so complicated? What if that love was only return?? If only we knew...
Created in Adobe Photoshop Song: A Martyr for My Love by The White Strips
So fucking pissed off about shit. Question of relationships and friendships. I let an individual get under my skin. Emotionally effect me. Not saying I deserve to be told off on the fact of how I've behaved. But it is over. Let go. Move on. Maybe don't even look back. Do I need to get you to hate me? Is that the answer. I will not be manipultaed like this again. I denied what my family said and didn't believe that was happening. But now I see. I wanted it to work but I guess I wasn't that willing. I feel you were still expecting something from me....darling don't expect so much.... I just wanna get away from all this....I just wanna leave....
Currently I've been watching Anime. Most recent one I've been watching is Claymore. I had heard about it before and wanted to either read the manga or watch the show. Thank goodness for Netflix. It's a pretty enthralling story. It's more on the line of a dark fantasy. Yomas kill eat people, Claymores(a race of golden blond chicks with big ass swords) kill yomas....even though hey themselves are half human half yoma. They are defintely some hardcore chicks to be taking hard hits and having limbs cut off. I'm half way through. Imma have to find another anime to watch soon. It's nice to spend the first day of the new year sitting back not doing a damn thing important LOL.
It is 2011.....yayyyy!!! Let's see what the year has in store yep. Today I will continue watching anime on netflix and browsing youtube vids for some cool dubstep beats. Check out the one I posted. I'm really starting to get in to Dubstep music. I go through phases and I love listening to new things. Dubstep is grimey and dirty. Kinda like Transformers fuckin' LOL. It's like Tron on Ecstasy....no wait on heroine. But Like on a bad heroine trip! LOL I'm still searching for new artist and I so wanna make my own beats. But I doubt that shit happens. Making music like that seems confuzzling.
So for the past few days in my sickeness I've just been doing some vector stuff. Here is a vid of my Vamp Girl that I just recent finished. I added this cool dub-set song with it.
Beside that ITS NEW YEARS EVE.......yayy( said unenthusiastically) I'm just kinda like...blah...over the fact that a new year is starting. It could just mean a different year but the same bullshit. I'm optimistic but i'm just....blah. I mean let me make some money off my art, let me go to France, let me become that special someone in his arms....now that's what I want for my new year heh heh. I hate making New Years Resolutions because I think in a since their a bunch of bull. A person finds it better to set a goal for themselves at the beginning of the year. What about just doing or trying to accomplish that goal regardless of what 4 digits appear on the new calendar. Me, my only goal....is living and let live.
So...yeah Christmas Break is here. No school, no classwork....that doesn't eliminate emotional drama. But in all i'm enjoying it. I've been just really thinking about my art and focusing on getting things done.....as well as exploring the AWESOME world of Netflix. I've been in anime mode. It's like a freaking Anime buffet. so many to chose from that I've never heard of before. I'm currently watching Witchblade which I'm liking alot.....but until I can find something else useful to talk about I leave you with a song..... ^_^
